Sometimes you’ve got no other option but to confront someone. But how? We’re not born with the ability to do confrontation well; we have to learn the art of it through practice and patience. Practice can be tricky though because we don’t like confrontation; in fact, we actively avoid it. But avoiding it just leads to issues in our relationships, a whole load of unresolved problems and us not getting any better at it. Not a great result. So let’s take a look at how we can start doing confrontation well. The first step is to check your motives. Ask yourself why you’ve decided to confront someone. If you’re trying to tell someone off, get something off your chest or guilt trip someone then you need a motive re-think. Confrontation shouldn’t come from a place of resentment. It should come from an aim to achieve a better relationship with the person instead. So it’s a good idea to confront yourself before confronting anyone else – wrong motives can have bad results and people can end up offended. The Bible says that ‘a brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city’ (Proverbs 18:19 KJV). But, if the person knows you truly care about them and you’re trying to do it the God-way, then your confrontation has a much better chance of success.
What Now?
Do you feel you need to confront someone about an issue? Spend some time praying about your motives and make sure your concern is coming from a heart of love, not of resentment.