We might have our motives sorted, but how do we know the best time to confront someone? It’s probably not a good idea to confront your housemate as soon as they walk through the door after a day of work. Or to confront your friend when they’re clearly having a bad day. It’s also best to confront someone when they’re on their own. Jesus said, ‘If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private’ (Matthew 18:15 NASB). Confronting someone when loads of people are around can end up with them getting defensive to try and save their reputation. (Your goal is to reconcile, not embarrass, after all.) It’s worth thinking about where to have the confrontation. It’s probably not wise to have the confrontation at your house or their house. You want a neutral location in case things get heated and either of you need a place to retreat to. A heated end to the confrontation wouldn’t be the ideal result, but sometimes you have to temporarily lose people to win them later. If you don’t see an outcome from the confrontation straight away, don’t worry. ‘Whoever rebukes a person will in the end gain favour rather than one who has a flattering tongue’ (Proverbs 28:23 NIVUK). Take a look at those words again: ‘in the end.’ Keep praying about it and allow the Holy Spirit to work in the person’s heart. But you’ve got to take the risk and confront the situation if you want any kind of change. If you don’t, things will remain the same – or get worse. Just remember to pick your time wisely.
What Now?
If the situation you prayed about yesterday really does need to be faced, spend time today thinking about the best way to handle it – the best time and the best place.
