Bulldozers are good at demolishing things, but they’re useless at building things. With that picture in mind, ask yourself, ‘Do I use the force of my personality and the power of my position to impose my will on people and get them to do things my way?’ If your answer is yes, then understand this: those who are the most controlling are often the most afraid of being controlled! Question: what do you fear would happen if you treated others with respect and considered their input, ideas, and choices? Is fear and intimidation the only way you can imagine of holding on to relationships? Wouldn’t you rather earn the love of others by being considerate rather than cruel, or are you willing to settle for fearful submission? If you need to, talk to a friend or counsellor and try to get to the root of the deeper issues that are driving your behaviour. Over the next week, try not to criticise or rob anyone of his or her right to choose. Remember that even God gives people the power of choice. And you’re not God. Keep this challenge going for two more weeks or for as long as it takes to get your controlling attitude under control. Paul was prolific enough to write the epistles and powerful enough to raise the dead, yet he said, ‘We were gentle among you, just as a nursing mother cherishes her own children’ (v. 7 NKJV). When people made mistakes, Paul said, ‘Restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted’ (Galatians 6:1 NKJV). So, the word for today is – try to be more gentle.
