John Gray wrote the best-selling book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. His underlying idea is this: in order to get along with someone, you have to try and see life from their perspective. And that’s not easy. Paul wrote: ‘Clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts’ (vv. 12-15 NLT). People who demand that others think and act exactly the same way they do are often masking insecurities. They have a deep-rooted need to see their own opinions confirmed through the way other people behave and think. But that’s not how life works. Disagreements happen in any relationship where more than one person is involved. We’re all unique, and it’s highly unlikely that we’ll agree on everything. But the way we handle our disagreements can determine whether a relationship will last. Being fair, opening ourselves to the ideas and perspectives of others and to new ways of doing things, is how we grow. In the end, we may even ‘agree to disagree’ rather than insist the disagreement ends with a winner and a loser. The important thing is to respect the other person’s ideas and try to create an environment where everyone involved can feel free to express their feelings and be who they really are without the fear of being judged.
